Getting Unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 21

Well, I know I said awhile back that I was going to carry this series all the way out to 31 days but things are very close to being complete right now and I have 10 posts left to get to 31...  Of course, with the way the past month+ has been going, more stuff will probably jump out of the woodwork lol.

Cleaning >>>

For the past 2 days I've really just dealt with lots of random papers and pages torn out from magazines - it's fairly slow and arduous work but the results have definitely lifted some of the stress off my shoulders :-)

1. My porch is looking fantastic!!
     a. I put a small plastic basket next to the loveseat to be a "to read" magazine container and to hold my pens and markers that end up all over the floor.
     b. I have a very small stack of papers to still go thru on the porch but I think it's mostly just coupons to clip.

2. My bookshelves are full - - - ACK!!
     a. Okay, so after putting all of my empty folders and notebooks back in my bookcase (including those that were in a different location), they take up an entire shelf :-(
     b. I have no room for my education books - - this is gonna be interesting to figure out a solution to.

3. I put more cards in my card boxes and more memories in my memory folder.

4. Found more scientific articles online and recycled the papers - they KEEP SHOWING UP lol.

5. I organized my biology books into the following categories: Bio textbooks, Non-bio Science textbooks, Environmental Science, Invertebrates, Fungi+, Plants, Birds/Mammals, and Theory.  This sorting method has made it extremely easy to put random pamphlets, brochures, and handouts from conferences in appropriate and easily located places.

State-of-mind pic of the day.

I forget what species of bird this is but,

is it not absolutely gorgeous?!

[Taken by me in Ngornogro Crater, TZE]

Spiritual thoughts >>>
Chapter 9 of Unstuck makes several really great points about the Bible:
- There is a Person behind the pages.
- This amazing, ancient, yet still relevant book is the narrative story of God - it is HIS-story.
-The Bible is a compass more than a roadmap.

Now for the mundane, remember my promise a few posts ago? lol...
Over on Good Morning Girls, Jen wrote a fabulous post about recognizing God in our everyday mundane tasks.  Below is my take on it::

Ephesians 2:10 says:
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. [My emphasis added.]
According to this verse, our day-to-day tasks have been prepared for us by God - and considering that God knit us together in the womb, these works were probably laid out for us long before we breathed our first breath.  We were created so that we could carry out these works.  What a great way to look at tasks that we must complete that seem insignificant or boring!

I've already written multitudes on how we should do everything in our lives to the glory of God :-)
Just check out Day 6 (there are more days too).

Phillipians 2:14 says:
Do everything without complaining or arguing.
Hmmm...yeah, I think this is something that everyone needs to keep in mind.  I clearly remember the ridiculous number of Facebook statuses I posted while I was struggling through writing my M.S. thesis.  Let's just say that they were not uplifting or pump-me-up in nature.  I grumbled and whined in status after status.  I was truly struggling and was having real difficulty in getting through the arduous task in front of me, but regardless, I really don't think all of my Facebook friends had any desire to read status after status of complaining!! *blush* - how embarrassing looking back on it :-/

Well, more tomorrow!  We'll see what ends up on the chopping block ;-)

Getting Unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 20

Cleaning >>>
It's going a little slow cuz I'm getting down to some of the nitty gritty now - but here's a quick list of some successes...

1. I'm a packrat right?  Well, that means that all the old folders I had in college that didn't completely get used up are still in my possession...  Yep!  Even if the backs of them were falling off.  So today I went through that ginormous stack and managed to get rid of the ones that were the worst for wear...of course while saving all of the paper inside...  Hey, it does save money in the long run.  I don't think I'll ever run out of lined paper...lol!

2. I also had several stacks of papers that just needed to be filed away and that's now done - hallelujah for completing the simple but naggling things :-)

3. I've continued to go through a few of my old academic folders and notebooks and have been getting rid of papers by the stack.

4. I re-examined my 2 3-ring binders, folder, and manila envelope full of church memories, dramas, and lesson plans and managed to get them all down to just 1 3-ring binder and a folder - yayness :-)

5. I'm still working on the bookcases (#s 1, 3, and 4 having something to do with that).  It's been way more difficult than I had originally envisioned.  But it may actually be completed tomorrow...fingers crossed!

State-of-mind pic of the day.

Ngorongoro Crater in TZE (taken by me).

Spiritual reflections >>>

Chapter 9 of Unstuck contains a number of great Bible passages, and while reading them, I did my best to apply the methods found in Day 17 and Day 18.  Here is what I metabolized...

Matthew 6: 22-23 [The Message]:
     Your eyes are windows into your body.  If you open your eyes wide in wonder and belief, your body fills up with light.  If you live squinty-eyed in greed and distrust, your body is a dank cellar.  If you pull the blinds on your windows, what a dark life you will have!
     The note I wrote to myself in the book's margin was this: "If I allow myself to take in the beauty of God's creation and His promises, then joy and light will take the place of pain and doubt."
     While my eyes may not be squinty with greed, I definitely find them at times quite squinty with distrust - not trusting in His plan for my future and my life here on Earth.  But if I consider that the way I look at the world (and the magnificence that is God) is a window into my body or how my body/feelings react to my surroundings, then I have a much better chance of conquering the shackles of depression and doubt.

Proverbs 4:20-22 :
     Pay attention to what I say; turn your ear to My words.  Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to one's whole body.
[my emphasis added]
     This simple phrase is an incredibly clear call to all Christians to seek out God's wisdom and truly engage in His word.  We must find His words, and to do that, we cannot just read them...

     To end, I want to share a quote in this chapter from J. I. Packer:
"God's purpose in revelation is to make friends with us.  God's friendship with men and women begins and grows through speech.  His to us in revelation, and ours to Him in prayer and praise.  Though I cannot see God, He and I can yet be personal friends, because in revelation He talks to me." [my emphasis added]
     Simply...Wow!

Hope that last quote leaves you in good spirits, it certainly brings a smile to my heart :-)

The Smiles of Tanzanians :-)

     When I was a resident of Tanzania for 2 1/2 months in 2008, I lived with the happiest most loving people I have ever had the joy of meeting.  I just read a post from Michael Hyatt about his experiences in Ethiopia that greatly resonated with this amazing period of my life.  My favorite quote from his post makes an incredibly accurate and eye-opening observation, "Despite all of [their difficulties], the Ethiopian people remained joyful in the midst of unrelenting hardship."  I can definitely say the same for the Tanzanian people.

     Needless to say, I wanted to share some pictures of both of my lovely Tanzanian home stay families.  

Their smiles are contagious :-)  

     I guess I should start with some background to explain why their smiles are so fantastic and should teach us in the U.S. quite a lesson - as pointed out in the above linked-to post by Michael Hyatt.

     I lived with my Bangatan home stay family for 3 weeks towards the beginning of the trip.  My Swahili was lacking quite a bit and their English was all but non-existent, and yet we still managed to connect right away.  So much so that when I visited a month and a half or so later to tell them that I unfortunately had to leave the country early and I would not be able to see them again in the near future, my 3 year old brother David (pronounced Dev-dee) grabbed on to me and repeatedly exclaimed in Swahili, "Sister, don't go!!"  Tears were flowing from both of our eyes.  So the hardships?  Well, they did have a store attached to the house (a duka), which meant my Baba (father) didn't have to travel to get to work, but also meant that when the rainy season came and the road up the mountain got severely muddy and nearly impassable, business went down (Bangatan residents could not get down the mountain to work).  They also were one of the few houses to have electricity.  But...they had no running water, their kitchen was a lean-to made of sticks with a dirt floor, and they had to keep selling their livestock to get more of an income.  They did have it pretty good compared to most of their neighbors, but by American standards, they were not so well off.  None of this phased me or them it seemed.  Mama David was always so joyous and so loving and caring of me.  David was such a happy little 3 year old and he latched on to me with an incredible unconditional love super fast.  Baba David didn't smile all that much (I think that might just be an East African grown man thing though), but he was so welcoming of me, and even let me sit in his shop whenever I had time so that I could learn more Swahili and interact with the community.

Me and my kaka (brother) David.

He was such a sweet little guy.

Just look at that unbarred JOY :-)

Mama David (my Bangatan Mama) joyfully embroidering

a beautiful dress for me.

     I lived with my Maasai family for about 5 days towards the end of the trip.  I even went back an extra night while all of the other students were staying back at camp.  The minute my Bibi (grandmother) saw me returning as she sat up against a tree, she reached up and pulled me into a huge bear hug exclaiming my name.  This family lived in cow dung huts, had no electricity, and no running water.  The women spent their days sitting in the shade on cow skin hides beading jewelry to sell (the perfect life if you ask me...).  My Yeyo (mama) didn't speak Swahili at all so I had to communicate with her through my Shingazi (aunt).  Regardless of our verbal communication difficulties, there was an unspoken love and feeling of family among us all.  Maria, my little sister, followed me everywhere and got as close to me as she could when we would sleep at night (man can that girl kick in her sleep!!).  I don't think I ever saw Sale, my little brother, not smile.  Raehleah, my little cousin, was always playing silly games with me.  Yeyo Simbai involved me in everything she could, even a dance a short walk away where the women were singing higher than I thought possible and jumping up and down, artfully clanging their necklaces.  And Shingazi Anna snuck a 2nd brand on me by doing the "look over there" trick.  I can't say enough about how much this family changed my life.  I think of them daily even though it's been 4 years since I last saw them.

Me and my Maasai family.

From left to right: Yeyo (Mama) Simbai, Nabo,

Sale, Maria, me, and my cousin Raehleah.

My sister Maria.

My sister Nabo.

 Me and my brother Sale.

Me and my brother N'geke.

My Shingazi (Aunt) Anna and two of my baby cousins.

Hopefully these photos show just how joyful people can be, regardless of the American-compared circumstances they are in.  I realized very quickly that the people of Tanzania have much more to teach Americans than Americans have any right to think that they (Americans) can teach them (Tanzanians).  People should never go into another country expecting to change citizens' ways of life - we should never be so arrogant as to think that our American way of life is the only right way.

Note: I will most likely post some of these pictures again in the future :-)

That's all for now...

Inspiration and Successes - Getting Unstuck IMWW Christ - Day 19

Told you it wouldn't take long...  I'm feeling really good right now.  All it took was me refocusing on how much I do enjoy hanging out with myself - a super important thing for everyone to learn to be able to do.  I've just been spending so much time with other people that I'd almost forgotten :-(

 And I have a number of cleaning/organizing successes to share::

My donation/sell pile at the moment!!

On top on the left is the bear rug I was talking about...lol :-P

The VIALS!!!  

Hopefully this makes it obvious why 

it took FOREVER to clean all of them out...

I went through this entire HUGE stack.

Notice the straw in front for scale!

And below are the calendar pictures that I have chosen to frame.

All the rest are being recycled!!!

If you can't tell, I cut down 7 calendars into just 14 pictures.

And actually threw out the entirety of the 8th one.

That's 96 >> 14!!! 

I'm planning on framing them as shown above - so 7 framed pictures in all.

I LOVE IT!!!

And now to the INSPIRATION...

One of the BEST Christmas presents EVER!!!!

If I have something as fabulously collectible as this metal, old-school, Star Wars lunchbox, there is NO reason to keep the dumb, flimsy stuff around.  By keeping this beautiful item in mind, it will be much easier to get rid of things that don't match up to its amazingness ;-D

And spiritual reflections...

As is obvious from today's earlier posts, it's been a pretty down day.  But I want to share a few things, and say that if I had taken them to heart already then maybe today wouldn't have been such a downer...

"Powered by 4" = Reading scripture at least 4 times a day.  Apparently this is the cutoff b/w scripture making a difference in your life and scripture just being a fly by night sort of thing.

"Receiving scripture daily--along with reflecting on it and responding to it--transforms us.  We can expect (1) direction from God, (2) the ability to discern His truth from competing voices, (3) freedom from wrong thinking, and (4) a way to withstand temptation." - From Chap. 8 of Unstuck (my emphasis added)

That's all for now!!  Have a fabulous Wednesday night!

And...GO USA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D

Addendum to the previous post - what I realized.

So after letting my thoughts settle for about 5 minutes, I realized just how sinful the last post was for a number of reasons.

First and foremost is that I'm not trusting in what my friends say.  I'm not accepting their love for me.  It hit me how similar this is to thinking God could never forgive you for a particular thing.  If you don't believe that God can forgive you for something - then you are severely insulting His power and grace.  In other words, I'm insulting my friends' hospitality by questioning their motives.  I love them and trust them enough, no matter how crazy they may be lol, to believe that when they say I am welcome that I am welcome.

I can't say that I'm not still questioning my value and worth at the moment, but I refuse to question people that I care about.  I value them, and so they deserve my thankfulness and trust rather than my confusion and pitifulness.

Guess I did have an uplifting thought in me...

Almost through my study and now...I'M STUCK

So I haven't posted in a week.  I hadn't gotten much cleaning done before yesterday and my mind has been insanely distracted.

Warning - This post is very personal...

Honestly, I'm severely stuck at the moment.  I had an absolutely fantastic time in Sewanee catching up with old and new friends.  I even got to talk a good bit with a couple of my favorite profs, which is always a joy.  I felt at peace there in the stillness, away from all of my questions and life concerns.

Now that I'm back to reality, I'm as confused and frustrated as ever.  When I arrived home, I was greeted with a blast of heat from inside my condo - my A/C was broken (in 100 degree weather) - oh happy day!  Luckily I have friends in the complex that I was able to stay with for 4 nights in a row.  It was so fantastic to be around other people, laughing and talking and watching the Olympics while not by myself.  Of course I also felt like I was imposing a lot and my sinful self began to doubt my worth and value - Were they just being nice? or Did they really want me there?  Were they tolerating me? or Did they enjoy my presence?

Some advice I received yesterday really tore me up and now I feel disconnected and simply don't care.  Running to God at the moment has me all the more desiring the things of this world - a family and companionship.  I know that Christ loves me immensely and unconditionally and that no love on earth can match His, but that doesn't stop me from so desperately wanting to be loved and cared for in the here and now and to have someone to love and care for in the here and now.

I don't have any uplifting thoughts or quotes to share.  I don't know that an uplifting thought or quote would even help me right now.  It won't take long for me to get back on track - these moments come and go, but for right now, I'm just tired...

Getting Unstuck - Day 18

Hello all!

     Well, I've decided to take a short hiatus from the home front and am visiting friends at my alma mater - the beautiful Sewanee :-)  I definitely needed a break from everything and my mind always clears better and my relaxation level sky rockets whenever I'm here.  There's something about the mountains, the Oxford-style stone buildings, the lack of heavy traffic, and the peacefulness that never fails to renew my soul.

Although I'm not in this picture,

it captures the essence of Sewanee unbelievably well,

what with the gorgeous building in the background,

the robes adorning 2 of my older sisters,

and the happiness and contentment 

radiating from their faces right after graduation.

I haven't seen them in years, but I've no doubt that

the minute I see them again, whenever that may be,

we'll run to each other with arms wide open 

and start talking like no time has passed.

     As you've no doubt noticed in the last handful of posts, my cleaning has slowed down a good bit and I really need to ramp it up, seeing as there are only about 4 weeks before school starts.  Plus, I'd much rather spend my only free weeks of the summer reading, crafting, and generally relaxing with no organizationally-related stress hanging over my head.  So I guess my real goal is to finish organizing by the time I complete my Unstuck study.  Now I realize that organizing and cleaning will always be a continual process, but once I get everything where it needs to go and have solid systems in place, the challenge of making the big decisions will be gone and the continual maintenance tasks will be miles easier to handle.  With all of this in mind, I think a break from the chaos is just what I need to get me back on track once I get home on Friday.


     I'm going to be in this small little town 30 minutes from the nearest Walmart until Friday afternoon - so what am I going to be able to do cleaning-wise??  A surprising amount with relaxation still as my main focus of course...  Although I don't have house junk to deal with, this will be a really great time to go through stuff that I ignore when I'm at home and there's so much visible junk assaulting my eyeballs and stress levels.

- My wallet : I'm on Learnvest now which is a fabulous site for organizing your finances.  In other words, I thankfully don't need to go through receipts and enter them by hand anymore!  But I can't just throw the whole huge receipt chunk away because of 2 things...
     1. CVS receipts could be for meds or groceries
     2. Coupons lurk in the jumble ;-)

- My car : Ugh I'm SO terrible at keeping my car clean...it's really embarrassing.  Although I don't have old food laying around, I do have empty cups (both throw away and not) as well as other junky crap.  I think I'll finally get the chance to take care of several things in my car...
     1. Throw away the trash!
     2. Upload the CDs rattling around in my trunk to my computer
     3. Go through the academic folders that were in my old Biology office
     4. And I'm sure there's more crap to deal with

- Online bookmarks : While I did get rid of a bunch of these a few months ago, I really think this needs a maintenance session.  Plus, now that I'm on Pinterest...
     1. I can get rid of all my crafting bookmarks by moving them to my CraftyLove board.
     2. upcycling bookmarks to Upcycled Magic
     3. greening (my word for living an eco-friendly lifestyle) to Green Cleaning - Home & Body
     4. organizing to Mission Organization
     5. and products I like to Super Cool Products

- Email : I keep the most ridiculous types of old email.  So here are some questions I'm going to ask myself...
     1. Do I really need communications with old profs that say, "Okay I'll see you then." - Uh, NO.
     2. Is it so extremely old news-wise that it's just not relevant anymore?
     3. Can I just pin it instead?
     4. Is this the only email in a folder? - Why might that be?
     5. Did I already receive this offer in the mail? (free samples and such)
     6. These coupons are really outdated...aren't they...
     7. Can this information easily be found somewhere else if I really need it?

- Education/Scientific articles : Okay, so we'll see how much time I have left over for these in between all of the above and hanging out with my friends, but it's worth listing.  I have saved tons of pdfs and bookmarked tons of online articles about education and scientific research.  Problem is, most of them have been sitting on my computer for a long time and still haven't been read.  I'm going to make the effort (when I get back) to start reading at least 5 a day - that should really be part of my job as a grad student anyway ;-)

State-of-mind pic of the day.

On our way from Ndarakwai Game Reserve, TZE.

(taken by me)

A couple of quick spiritual notes about Reflecting on God's Word  >>
   
     When reading a passage, one should really engage with it.  Unfortunately, this word gets a person all excited with abstract ideas of dynamic interaction and digging into the meat of something.    
   
But how do we do this??  Here are some questions that you can ask yourself while reading scripture:

- How do I feel about these verses?
- What is difficult for me mentally/emotionally about these verses?
- What do I not understand?
- Is my way of thinking a stumbling block to God's way of thinking?
- What is He reminding/asking me to do?
- What is He revealing that I had forgotten or never known?
- Is He giving me a promise?
- Is He warning/disciplining me?
- Is He encouraging me?
- What is His message uniquely to me?
- What does this reveal about God's character?
- What is His message to all Christians?
- Is He telling me to slow down and sit with Him like He told Martha?

     Many more questions can be asked but these are a great starting point to get us each individually thinking about the best ways we personally can approach not just reading, but engaging with scripture.