Getting unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 17

Good morning all!
I spent all day yesterday either at church or sleeping (lol), but the day before that was pretty successful :-)

I'll start with some spiritual reflections...
Chapter 8 of Unstuck lays out some great tips for truly engaging with scripture >>

1.  Receive God's Word
     To begin engaging with scripture we must set out with a mind to "spiritually consume" it a.k.a. we must "metabolize scripture."  How cool is that description?  Haha, ok, I am a biologist so I can really connect with this metaphor.  Think about the way that we approach a delicious meal...we take in the aroma, let our eyes indulge in the yumminess laid out before us, and as our eyes and nose heighten our anticipation for what we know is going to be absolutely delicious, our salivary glands start working over-time and our mouths start to water.  Then we dig our fork into the food and lift it to our tongues and slowly savor the tastes and smells that flow through our senses.  This is how we should engage with scripture - as a delicious banquet laid out for us to consume.  As Ruth Haley Barton says, "When we engage the Scriptures for spiritual transformation...we engage not only our mind but also our heart, our emotions, our body, our curiosity, our imagination and our will."

2.  Reflect on God's Word
Two passages from Luke Chapter 2 do a great job of displaying how Mary, the mother of Jesus, does just this.

17  And when [the shepherds] saw [the baby], 

they made known the saying that had been told to them 

concerning this child.

18  And all who heard it wondered 

at what the shepherds had told them.

19  But Mary treasured up all these things,

pondering them in her heart.

49  And He said to them,

"Why were you looking for me?

Did you not know that I must be in my Father's house?"

50  And they did not understand the saying that He spoke to them.

51  And He went down with them and came to Nazareth

and was submissive to them.

And His mother treasured up all these things in her heart.

     Both of the above passages describe situations in which Mary and the people around her were confused and unable to understand what was being said in regards to Jesus.  Instead of just simply wondering about them and moving on, accepting confusion, Mary stored these thoughts up in her heart so that she could continue metabolizing them and gain a greater understanding of her son and His destiny.
     I have to admit that there are plenty of times when I read something in scripture and after a few times of passing my eyes over the words without grasping anything, I just move on, "promising" myself that I'll examine it more closely later.  This is definitely an area that I need to work on - I'll expand on this in my next Unstuck post.

3.  Respond to God's Word
This is essentially another way of looking at sanctification - that journey all Christians take to become more and more like Christ.
1 Corinthians 13:13 [The Message]>>

13  But for right now, until that completeness 

[when we arrive in Heaven],

we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation:

Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly,

love extravagantly.  And the best of the three is love.

Consider what C.S. Lewis said in Mere Christianity:
     "The New Testament...talks about Christians 'being born again'...about 'putting on Christ'; about Christ 'being formed in us'; about our coming to 'have the mind of Christ.'
     Put right out of your head any ideas that these are only fancy ways of saying that Christians are to read what Christ said and try to carry it out - [...] It is not a question of a good man who died two thousand years ago.  It is a living Man, still as much a man as you, and still as much God as He was when He created the world, really coming and interfering with your very self; killing the old natural self in you and replacing it with the kind of self He has."
With this in mind, simply reading definitely isn't enough!

So in regards to cleaning...
     ** Went through some more of my academic folders and got rid of a bunch of stuff!  It's funny how you think an entire folder full of papers from a class relevant to your future is going to be useful...yeah no, once I started combing through some of the untouchable folders - I found a lot that I could recycle - and, of course *sigh*, more scientific papers that I could just find online and save as pdfs.
     ** Continued to go through my giant stack of completely random papers - once I get through it all, I'll post a picture - the size of this sucker is depressing...
     ** Finished filing away all my coupons
     ** Started cleaning out empty vials (from the bugs...)

Because I feel like things are going a little too slowly, today I'm setting some goals >>
1. Finish putting all my books in my bookcases
2. Finish cleaning out all the empty vials
3. Finish going through the giant paper stack
4. Fold the clean clothes sitting in the laundry room (yeah, this pile has been sitting there since before my LBS challenge...lol)

State-of-mind pic of the day:

A banana grove in the village of Mto wa Mbu, TZE.

[taken by me]

Well, that's all for today - here's to being hopeful for a productive afternoon!!

...oh yeah...I also have a paper that I need to get started...

Getting unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 16

One of my best friends popped by this afternoon and so any plans I had made to organize this evening went out the window - but I'm super excited and thankful that she came by!  This'll be a short post, but I at least wanted to stay on track ;-)


Cleaning...
     Today was another fairly slow day but I did manage to get a few things done.  I've realized that it helps a great deal to keep my mind on staying intentional and persevering to the end.  I just repeat the mantra, "be intentional, be intentional" over and over in my mind and I can make it through even the most mundane of tasks (more on the mundane tomorrow).

So accomplishments:
- all coupons are clipped
- all old coupons are thrown away
- all current coupons are filed away
- maintenance cleaning is still going well!!
- dishes were put away
- some newspapers were gone through
- some snail mail was dealt with
- some random articles about Buffy I had laying around (haha) were read and recycled
- and email is back down to manageable levels...


Spiritual reflections...
"You are going to come across words and sentences that stab you awake to a beauty and hope that will connect you with your real life." - Eugene H. Peterson

What a great view of the love story that we have so easily available at our fingertips!

John 8:31-32 says >>

31  So Jesus said to the Jews 

who had believed him, 

"If you abide in my word, 

you are truly My disciples,

32  and you will know the truth, 

and the truth will set you free."

-Is truth setting me free? [question from Chapter 7 of Unstuck]
     Many times truth does set me free.  I anxiously await those glorious moments when Christ's love fills me with awe and admiration and I cannot believe that I am His wife and am always wrapped in His arms.  But honestly, my depression and loneliness does occasionally bring me away from the freedom that truth brings.  When I fall into these feelings, it's a downward spiral that sucks me in and refuses to let me go.  I don't even want these feelings to let me go when I'm stuck in their bondage.  That's what's so weird about feeling down...once you're there, you just crave more and more.  I know these feelings will always be a part of me (brain chemistry is simply a fact of life, says scientist me), but I also know that, with Christ's help, I don't have to be in bondage to them.  His joy, love, and freedom can fill me with the utmost sense of completeness and fulfillment...I just have to be willing to not crave the shackles.

     I have resolved to memorize 2 Peter 1:3-11 to help keep my mind on higher things and to remember the great promises that I have in Christ Jesus >>

3  His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness,

through the knowledge of Him who called us to His own glory and excellence,

4  by which He has granted to us His precious and very great promises,

so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature,

having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire.

5  For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue,

and virtue with knowledge, 6 and knowledge with self-control,

and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness,

7  and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love.

8  For if these qualities are yours and are increasing,

they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful

in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

9  For whoever lacks these qualities is so nearsighted that he is blind,

having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins.

10  Therefore, brothers, be all the more diligent 

to confirm your calling and election, for if you practice these qualities

you will never fall.  11  For in this way there will be richly provided for you

an entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

State-of-mind pic of the day
Ngorongoro Crater, TZE (taken by me)

Getting unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 15

Some additional thoughts about Christ's love...

     Yesterday I was reacquainted with the fact that the Bible is a love story written just for me.  A love story written so that I could deeply engage in a powerfully intimate 2-way relationship with my Lord and Savior who is also my husband.  I think back to the ways I've felt and acted in earthly love relationships and I couldn't wait to spend more time with a boyfriend or talk to him or see him.  I would put homework and other tasks aside in a heartbeat if it meant more time with him.  I want to see Christ this way and want to devour his love letters to me.  I remember when my heart thrilled with joy at the site of an email, Facebook message, random physical note, or other such communication from an earthly love and wonder why I don't usually feel the same way when opening up the scriptures as I read the Word's of a man who died for me - not only to save me in this earthly life but to save me from ultimate damnation so that I would be able to spend eternity with Him!!  What love is greater than that??  

And now for some quotes from Chapter 6 of Unstuck >>

     Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote, "The Word of Scripture should never stop sounding in your ears and working in you all day long, just like the words of someone you love.  And just as you do not analyze the words of someone you love, but accept them as they are said to you, accept the Word of Scripture and ponder it in your heart, as Mary did."  [emphasis mine]

     Michael Ross, Unstuck author - "God's Word is a living masterpiece - a passionate love story - yet we often treat it as a legal resource to use as proof of what we believe." [emphasis mine]

     Michael Ross - "He wasn't leading me into Bible reading - He was compelling me to engage His message to me with a lover's passion.  He was showing me how to find my Savior in His pages...how to have 'a daily walk with Jesus.'"  [emphasis mine]

     And lastly, a quote from Ian Morgan Cron's novel, Chasing Francis: A Pilgrim's Tale [I haven't read this] on what the Bible really is beyond the doctrines and commandments, "But the Bible is less about ideas or doctrines than it is a story about people and their up-and-down relationship with God."  How true this is!  As little kids, we hear stories of big time biblical leaders from the pages of Scripture, but are often spared the messy details.  As we get older and start reading the Bible for ourselves, we see that each one of them  has some sort of downfall, sin that keeps trapping them in their humanity.  We are shown the fallibility of biblical/historical heroes so that we can truly see the extent of God's love and see how these heroes have a genuine 2-way relationship with God/Christ where He moves in their lives to change and mold them as they learn and grow.

     And once again, Jimmy Needham puts it brilliantly:

Take me, my love, escape with my heart

In chasing You

I will run right past the radiant sun

Until I find myself right where You are

[Right Where You Are]

So then, how did cleaning go yesterday?

- Well, I conquered LBS!!!!  Woohoo :-)  ...for a day at least lol.  I washed 3 loads and folded and put away all 3.  I even folded and put up the sheets I washed rather than just piling them on my bed, which seems to be my unfortunate habit...

- I also did a good bit of random maintenance cleaning, the results of which feel great this morning!

- And I ran the dishwasher and already have the clean dishes drying :-)

So not too much in the realm of organizing but I feel less buried and overburdened - which makes the organizing easier and makes me feel less stressed out.

I won't make goals today - we'll just have to see how everything goes...but I'm hopeful.

State-of-mind pic of the day.

Me in awed happiness in Maasailand, TZE.

(taken by me)

Getting unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 14

     Good morning!  I'm feeling pretty good about today's potential - I think I'm going to be able to get a lot done...yesterday was pretty much a no go with appointments and homework filling up my schedule.  I have to go out once today to take care of a couple of things but that shouldn't take much more than an hour - fingers crossed for today's success ;-)

Cleaning...
Regardless of yesterday's being a bust, I have done a few things already this morning.
-Washing towels
-Washing dishes
-Going through the 2 huge gray trash bags in the back room...they were pillows!!!...and a bear rug lol.  The bear rug immediately went to the donation pile - I loved it when I was a teenager and feel like a current teenager should now have it.  I also chose 1 of the pillows to give away.  The rest of the pillows will fit in perfectly in my living room - why in the world have I let them languish in a garbage bag for so long?!?  They're lovely :-)

     So one thing that I'm going to focus on today is LBS, which Sarah Mae discusses in her Day 10 post.  When I first saw this acronym, I assumed it meant Lazy Bones Syndrome, which of course is something important to tackle...but also very abstract.  No, LBS means Laundry Basket Syndrome - a much more concrete and conquerable deficiency!  If you are a person whose clean clothes pile up on your bed, in a chair, or in the laundry basket...then you suffer from LBS.  I certainly do!  I HATE folding clothes and so my clean clothes just pile up and up until I have to spend an inordinate amount of time focusing on redrying them to get the wrinkles out and putting them all up.  Or sometimes, I'll want to wear a particular shirt and so I have to dig through to find it and then toss it in the dryer for a few minutes - instead of simply pulling it out of the closet...lol.
     So today, I plan on going through all of my laundry and folding and putting up the clothes that are clean.  The Martha challenge is to do as many loads as you can, but to put away one load before starting the next - probably a good plan...  I just wish that the washer and dryer didn't have such different cycle lengths - but hey, that's a small complaint and I'll live ;-)
     The Mary verse for this challenge is Galatians 6:9 >>

And let us not grow weary of doing good,

for in due season we will reap,

if we do not give up.

What a great motivator and pick me up - definitely a verse to write on my heart for all those times when I just don't feel like continuing with certain tasks.

Okay, so on to Unstuck >>

     Last night I finished Chapter 6 and loved it!  A large part of this chapter is a story by a woman named Theresa about how she went from believing in a God of Rules to falling in love with the God of the Bible.  And that's what this chapter is mostly about - falling in love with Jesus.  What a fabulous and vital topic for every Christian to study.  One of my absolute favorite songs speaks to this so well - Jars of Clay's "Love Song for a Savior":

He's more than the laughter 

or the stars in the heavens

As close as a heartbeat 

or song on our lips

Someday we'll trust Him 

and learn how to see Him

Someday He'll call us 

and we will come running

and fall in His arms 

and the tears will fall down 

and we'll pray,

"I want to fall in love with You"

Maybe I like this song so much because it connects so well with my conversion experience.  I just realized how the last 3 lines of the chorus parallel perfectly with what I shared in yesterday's post.
No wonder this was the song that I ran to immediately after one of the scariest and most painful experiences of my life - one of the "bad things" I mentioned in Day 8's post.
   
    And...back to Theresa.  I'll give you some excerpts from her story because her words really put it well:
     
     "I realized I needed to pursue Christ as my closest companion and best friend.  I must put all else aside to be with Him.  He must be my heart's priority, even while I attend to life's everyday business." 

     Remember Day 11 and Day 6?

     "Being in relationship with Him isn't about religion or following rules.  To be in true relationship with Him I must pursue...
     ...His heart
     ...His passions
     ...His character
     ...the truth."

     "Nurturing a relationship involves trust, transparency, surrender, and above all a two-way connection.  Close friends - especially lovers - must talk and grow together daily, not occasionally."

     I know this last bit a little too well from bad experiences in earthly relationships.  In addition, I've been exposed several different times to the incredible truth that Jesus is our husband.  Just as the church is his bride, each Christian individually is also his bride.  Take a look at The Voice's translation of Zephaniah 3:17 >>

The Eternal your God 

is standing right here among you,

and He is the champion 

who will rescue you.

He will joyfully celebrate over you;

He will rest in His love for you;

He will joyfully sing because of you

like a new husband.

     So to truly build a firm and loving relationship with Christ, we must treat Him as if He is our husband...which He is!  And such an approach involves a lot more than passive robotocism!

     Theresa continues, "I am called to a dynamic, life-giving intimacy with Jesus.  He speaks to me; He leads me into deeper love and deeper truth and deeper life through His love letters written just for me (and just for you).  It is only through relationship with Jesus that I can become intimately engaged with Him through His word. And as I feed on His word to me, I am changed."

A great phrase she uses to describe this change is that He works to "love me into His image."

Oh how I want to be loved into His image and have an intimate deep personal relationship with my savior.  While to some degree this is the case currently in my life, there are so many moments when the relationship could be deeper.  I want to fall in love with Him daily and build up a glorious 2-way communication that pervades my life and doesn't just come up when I need Him most or when I am most thankful.

     The authors of Unstuck also add, "As Theresa spent time with Him, pursuing His heart, she began to see, to experience, to know Him as her King and her Lord, her Protector and her Provider, and most of all, the Lover of her soul."

I want to end with this verse from Daniel chapter 2:

22  He reveals deep and hidden things;

He knows what is in the darkness,

and the light dwells with Him.

Christ's light illuminates all of our deep, hidden, dark parts and although this may be a frightening concept to some, I want to point out that it is actually incredibly hopeful and uplifting.  Since He loves us no matter what, and He is well aware of our individual downfalls, He can all the better work in us to make us more like Him :-)

Check out Philippians 2:1-11 for more on the heart, character, and attitude of Christ.

State of mind pic of the day

Mazumbai, TZE (taken by me)

God of the failed, ungodly, unable, and unwilling...

     This morning I came across a quote, brimming with truth, beauty, and incredible hope  >>

“Christianity is the gospel of the failed, 

of the ungodly, the unable, the unwilling, 

who simply woke up one day 

invited to God’s house and went. Period.”

- John Lynch

My conversion experience was exactly like this.  
     I was driving home from high school one day listening to one of my WOW CDs from years past and Jaci Velasquez's "God So Loved"  came on.  Now I wasn't listening to this CD because I was a Christian or even had any Christian sentiments.  When I was in the 7th grade I went through a really odd phase in which I decided I was a "Christian" and got my mom to get me all these WOW CDs.  I even listened to the Christian radio station - 101.1 Reality.  The phase lasted for no more than 2 months at the most.  It didn't take long at all for me to revert right back to the previous religion that I held.  A religion that I practiced for some 8 years.  Sorry about not going into details on that matter, it's just a little too personal.
     So anyway, I'm driving along and this song starts streaming out of my speakers.  The words hit me as if I have never heard them before.  If you can't already tell from the song's title, the chorus is John 3:16 -

For God so loved the world,

that He gave His one and only Son

that whosoever believes in Him

will not perish but have

everlasting life.

I was suddenly incredibly aware of my failings and inability.  The reality of my sin hit me like a freight train, waking me up from an 18-year long coma.  God's desire for me to enter His house and be a part of His loving family washed over me with an unparalleled power.  He invited me into His house and I had no choice but to go - it simply wasn't possible to take any other path.  

     I woke up, was invited, and went.  Period.  Just like the above quote says.  I had no say in the matter and I am incredibly thankful for that.  Because if such a thing were left up to my incredibly human heart and mind, I don't know if I ever would have stepped over the threshold.  I am weak and unable and everyday I thank God for that truth!  I don't want to rely on my own power because, without God, I am a constant failure, a perpetual sinner, and useless to make a positive impact in this world.  But God doesn't care that that's who I am, He loves me despite all of that and maybe even because of all that.  He welcomes me into His arms because He is the God "of the failed, of the ungodly, the unable, [and] the unwilling."

Getting unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 13

Good evening all :-)

Organizational matters >>
     I continue to find more junk around my house that needs to be dealt with.
   
     Can you believe I still have terribly written stories from my early elementary years packed away in binders??  I finally realized that there's a big difference between those that are really cute and worth keeping and those that are just taking up space.  Looks like I really need to just read through the ones I don't remember so that I can gauge which category they fall into.  That's gonna take awhile, but I think I'll eventually be able to pair down my 3 folders to just 1.  Some of the really good ones that I wrote in middle school and beyond, I need to start retyping into my computer and back up on my external hard drive so that I can not only clear up space, but also make it possible to easily edit them in the future.
   
     In the same vein, I've been going through my art work for the zillionth time and am finally making those hard decisions, that I couldn't make before, on what's actually good enough to keep and what's actually memory-filled enough to keep.

     Same goes also for my theatre notes and such.  I'll keep scripts and playbills of plays I've been in but notes from activities that I did in classes...yeah, recycling bin!

     Oh, and last but not least, I had loads of English papers from high school and college - WHAT?!?  I'm not even interested in English.  Once again, a huge pile to the recycling bin, lol.

     That's pretty much been the extent of my cleaning for the past 24 hours, but that kind of stuff takes forever for Ms. Packrat...


And on to spiritual matters >>

     I finished Chapter 5 of Unstuck and want to mention a few more great finds from the chapter itself.

     First off, the authors give a 4th equation to add to the 3 equations of Paul's theology:

          Relationship (with Christ) + Truth (in the Word) = Spiritual Growth

     Additionally, as I mentioned in Day 12, we grow in and become more mature in our faith when we come face to face with our weaknesses.  I love this passage from Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:

9  But he said to me, 

"My grace is sufficient for you, 

for my power is made perfect 

in weakness."  

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly 

about my weaknesses, 

so that Christ's power may rest on me.

     And from the authors of Unstuck:  His grace is free; as we acknowledge our brokenness, we allow Him to work in our hearts on all levels.  He moves into our hurts, hopes, resentments, desires, mistakes - each and every last "region" of us.  He alone truly knows our most private thoughts, longings, and struggles.

     I can't think of a more uplifting message than this - that our failures and hurts are exactly what brings us closer to God.  Turning to him in our times of brokenness and need makes ALL the difference as I stated in Day 8 in regards to bad things that have happened in my life.  Because I welcomed God's working through me during those difficult and heartbreaking situations, I can now, on the other end, honestly tell people that I am thankful these things happened to me.  I don't regret them one bit because if they had never happened I would not be where I am now.  In my opinion, this is one major difference between Christians and non-Christians - I rejoice in my pain because of the grace and divine closeness that it leads me to :-)

The Message's translation of Romans 12:11-12 puts what we must keep in mind quite nicely:

Don't burn out; 

keep yourselves fueled and aflame.  

Be alert servants of the Master, 

cheerfully expectant.  

Don't quit in hard times; 

pray all the harder.

In other words, we must always be vigilant to recognize the hard times and to treat them for what they are - amazing opportunities to grow more in Christ.

     I serendipitously ran across 3 different blog posts this morning that relate really well to today's post.  Check them out to read more on trusting God in any situation:

Is Your Mindset About God Flawed by Jamie - She takes sort of an opposite approach to this whole topic by reminding us that sometimes when we surrender all to God, He does give us great blessings - that it's not always about learning through suffering.

Liabilities and Assets by Sarah Markley - She gives a candid account of how while she would love to go back and change the mistakes that she made, she also wouldn't give them back for the world because of how they have changed her life in Christ.

A Reminder to Depend Like a Child - On how God wants us to depend on Him the way a child depends on his mother.

     I'll finish today by quickly covering the chapter's end questions.

Malachi 4:1-3 : What healing touch do I need from the Lord?

2  But for you who fear My name, 

the sun of righteousness shall rise 

with healing in its wings.  

You shall go out leaping 

like calves from the stall.

-Comfort in the fact that He has a plan for my future family.

Deuteronomy 4:32-40 : Do I live as though God truly is all-powerful and all-loving?

35  To you it was shown, 

that you might know that the Lord is God; 

there is no other besides Him.  36  

Out of heaven He let you hear His voice,

 that He might discipline you.  

And on earth He let you see His great fire, 

and you heard His words 

out of the midst of the fire.  37  

And because He loved your fathers

and chose their offspring after them 

and brought you out of Egypt 

with His own presence, by His great power, 38  

driving out before you 

nations greater and mightier than you, 

to bring you in, to give you their land 

for an inheritance, as it is this day, 39 

know therefore today, 

and lay it to your heart, 

that the Lord is God 

in heaven above and on the earth beneath; 

there is no other.

-Not when I fall into the bondage of lonely thoughts and disconnected feelings.

Matthew 15:21-28:  Do I live as though Jesus loves me fully, no matter my hang-ups and imperfections?

-Yes, I would say that the vast majority of the time I truly do.  

It's what gets me through every day :-)

     I'd also like to mention that this story of the faith of a Canaanite woman is a fantastic example of how Jesus just wants us to show unwavering faith in how we approach our lives.  I'd never looked at the passage in this way before but since Jesus started off with chastisement of the woman for expecting something from Him even though she was not a Jew then ended, after her display of faith, by offering her full access to Him, the meaning of this story really opened itself up to me.

State-of-mind pic of the day: 

Tarangire National Park in Tanzania

(taken by me)

That's all for now!  Good luck in cleaning and have a fabulous Sunday night :-)

Getting unstuck in my walk with Christ - Day 12

Wow ... it's been longer than I thought!  I've just been super distracted lately hanging out with friends...definitely a worthy distraction :-)

The parental visit went well.  My dad complimented my DIY jewelry holder, which was really nice since my mom's response a few months ago was, "Oh..."  We had a delicious fancy meal which was a welcome change from my usual budget fare ;-)  And, of course, the visit wouldn't have been complete if my mom had not almost immediately started folding clothes and cleaning my windowsills...I didn't complain though...just kinda laughed :-P

In cleaning news (post-visit)...

All of the bug palettes are FINALLY out of my living room!!  I placed them as nicely as possible on the lower center bookshelf in the "hobby room" with the display boxes for pinned bugs on top.  It'll never be the most beautiful thing to look at...as you'll see once I post pictures, but it's WAY better than taking up an entire corner in the living room.  Now I just have to finish washing out the empty vials and choosing which of those vials I actually want to keep and continue to take up space with...

My bookshelves are shaping up quite well...I still have a ridiculous amount even though I've filled 5 bags already to donate or sell.  The most difficult part is grouping since my shelves are only so big and I have huge amounts of certain genres...vampire books literally take up 1.5 shelves.  To make the separation onto 2 shelves make more sense, I put all the series on one shelf and all the onesies on the 1/2 shelf with other fantasy novels.  It works pretty well actually.  Hopefully, the bookshelves will all be finished by the end of the day...

In honor of my spending more time with others, 

I wanted to share this photo as my Day 12 state-of-mind pic.  

From left to right, Shingazi Anna (my aunt), Yeyo Simbai (my mama), 

Raelay (my cousin), and of course me.  

I only spent 5 days with them, but they will always be my family :-)

Spiritual reflections...
I finished Chapter 5 of Unstuck and it was a really great refresher on the daily struggle with sin that even the most devout Christians have.  Take Paul for example (Romans 7),

15  For I do not understand my own actions.

For I do not do what I want,

but I do the very thing I hate.

18  For I know that nothing good dwells in me,

that is, in my flesh.

For I have the desire to do what is right,

but not the ability to carry it out.

19  For I do not do the good I want,

but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.

20  Now if I do what I do not want,

it is no longer I who do it, 

but sin that dwells within me.

Just the convoluted nature of this passage clearly shows how difficult the struggle is.  But to give us hope, even faced with the reality of an intense sin struggle for a Christian super star like Paul, check out 1 Corinthians 10:13 >>

13  No temptation has overtaken you 

that is not common to man.  

God is faithful, and he will not let you 

be tempted beyond your ability, 

but with the temptation 

he will also provide the way of escape, 

that you may be able to endure it.

When looking at these two passages together, I think the way of escape becomes quite clear.  While yes, as humans, sin dwells within us, the Holy Spirit is always there to be our helper and guide in knowing the mind and desires of Christ.

As J. I. Packer puts it, "Only at the point where the insufficiency of natural strength is faced, felt, and admitted does divine empowering begin."
So the struggle is real and our sinful natures are real, but the power of the Holy Spirit is also very real.  And it is only in the struggle and in our seeing just how broken and inept we are on our own, that the Holy Spirit can do it's most powerful work.  Just think about what happens at the moment of salvation - not only do you accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior, but you also become acutely aware of your sin and your human inability to meet God's standards.

Additionally, the authors mention 3 "equations" that sum up Paul's theology:

Christ + Salvation = Christianity


Love + Grace = Forgiveness


Surrender + Freedom = Faith

I'll end with a fabulous quote from J. I. Packer:

     The secret to discipline is divine empowerment, which builds internal strength.  Fortunately for us, the key to God's strength is our own weakness.  Through humble dependence on Jesus Christ we find the strength to put off our old life and to grow in our new one.  The power pitfall is self-reliance and failure to see that without Christ we can do nothing that is spiritually significant.  The power principle is that divine strength is perfected in human weakness.
     If I could remember each day of my life that the way to grow stronger is to grow weaker, if I would accept that each day's frustrations, obstacles, and accidents are God's ways of making me acknowledge my weakness so that growing stronger might become a possibility for me, if I did not betray myself into relying on myself-my knowledge, my expertise, my position, my skill with words, and so on-what a difference it would make to me!

I think that pretty much says it all :-)